The fight is over

My Dad died tonight at 10pm after 9 months of the worst most intense fight i've ever witnessed. It all begin on January 1st and ended tonight on September 1st. Right now a mixture of absolute sadness mixed with relief that someone i loved would stop suffering so much in front of my own eyes.

I've described this blog as the fall of david rooney because since january 1st that's all i've felt i've been doing. In a trance like state blindly walking through the tragic chain of events that have beset me and my family during this year.

The 4 people in my family we were always close. The one gift that my Dad told me was to laugh. I always grew up wanting to be like my Dad and make people laugh too. He always had a fun time and never took life seriously. Whilst i've sometimes thought i've taken after other people in hindsight i was always trying to be like my dad. Always trying to make people laugh. Always remaining private with my thoughts and feelings. I was trying to be like him.

I'll miss him dreadfully. Especially the night time chats i'd have with him as i'd come in from somewhere and chat to him in the kitchen about various matters. Things like football, politics, world history, scum...always topics covered. Or the funny nights we spent watching crap movies on tv. We never went to watch good movies we'd intentionally look through the tv guide to find the worst movie possible and end up watching it. I especially remember the night we watched texas chainsaw massacre and found it the funniest thing ever due to mainly the crappy acting. Maybe we had the same sense of humour i don't know.

He always stressed the importance of family to me and how we had to be strong for my sister and mum when my grandad died. I wasnt particularly strong i.e the mess of 2002 but at home with my mum and sister i was strong. I will have to be the same this time. But strong i will attempt to be.

Dad i know you'll never read this no matter where you are due to the fact you couldnt work a computer...but i want you to know how thankful i am for what you did for me. You gave me such a happy house to grow up in and taught me how to laugh and look at life. And i love you very much for it all.